You are just different:
I always failed my exams. From primary, the two subjects I failed were science and maths. I hated those two subjects. The teaching style wasn't for me and the way I was being treated was poor. Every minute of maths and science class, I would always wish it to be over.
The curriculum in Thailand is you learn 8 subjects which included Thai language, mathematics, science, social studies, religion and culture, health and physical education, arts, careers, technology, and foreign languages ( I had English and Chinese). It was a hard time with all of this and I wasn't the person to be good in school. I did horse riding so that was my get away from school.
The teaching style and the mindset of the system is "If you fail you are dumb and you'll never succeed." True, you are dumb. You fail on the same subject every year. "But you'll never succeed" Well... I am now living in The UK, I moved away from my home town at the age of 18, got a job for the summer, got into university and did humanities and Social Science, got an offer from a film school, wrote my first script and my first play, got in to a part time drama school, getting through a lot of things by myself and went to Nice and studied another language. I am succeeding in my present when I failed two subjects in my past. I started passing a bit more, then I failed History in my 5th year in primary school and then Math in high school.
The view of failing a subject means that you'll never be successful is false. When you have the mind to do something which you are passionate about or good at, you'll have something to give to the world and a purpose. Even though I failed every year, I knew I was good at sports. Every year, my school would have a sports day and I would always compete in it. I did at least two sports, basketball and Chair ball. Chair ball is a sport which is common in sport days. There are 12 on each side, 7 on the field, one holding the basket for their team to shoot at and one blocking the ball from their opponent who tries to shoot and there's 5 as a substitute. You can't move or bounce the ball and you can't hold it more than 2 seconds. The only way you can score is to find space and pass. It teaches you team work which is probably where I got my skills working as a team. I loved it. I competed for my school one year where we got third.
That feeling for me is trauma. It has always stuck in me that if I fail a subject, I'm just dumb in life and I will never succeed. Recently I found out that I have a resit for Japanese. I knew I didn't do well because I didn't finish the exam but at the same time, I was upset because I've been put through this situation again. I hated it and didn't really enjoy life or talk to anybody about it. This is where my family comes and helps me. I had a 30 minute phone call with my aunt discussing about this situation. Tears were running down my face and I tried to stay quiet because I didn't want her to know that I was crying. I told her about the mindset I was bought up with from the Thai education. She said to write the things you have accomplished down. So I did. I ended up with almost 70 things I have accomplished since moving away from Thailand last year.
Having someone who is there willing to help you and trying to give, the best advice they could possibly give. I felt so loved and appreciated. Surround yourself with people who are ready to lift you up when you are at your lowest. Never stay in a trap by surrounding people who don't give a damn about you.
"Don't be a shame of failure, it's just another mountain to climb over"
Source:
School Education System In Thailand | Education Destination Asia
